Rethinking Inner Stress: The Surprising Key To Healing, Health, and Happiness

There was a period in my life—not all that long ago—when I felt like I had hit a wall I couldn’t see coming.

I was healthy. I exercised. I meditated. I had a good life.

And yet… something shifted. Suddenly, I couldn’t sleep. I felt constantly anxious. I had sensations in my body that made no sense. I couldn’t think clearly, and at times I couldn’t function at all. My heart raced from the smallest exertion, and a strange numbness and tingling took over my body.

I visited specialists, changed my diet and tried supplements. All the traditional bloodwork and investigations pointed to the fact that I was in good health. I was given anti-depressants, sleep medications, and special diets.

Everyone said that it was all triggered by a period of intense stress.

But no one could tell me what that really meant—or how to actually heal.

The Inner Stress We Don’t Talk About

When we think of stress, we often think of the obvious: too much work, family demands, and world events. External stressors.

But what I’ve come to understand—through personal experience and years of guiding others—is that it’s not just what’s happening outside us. It’s what’s happening inside us that determines our ability to respond, to heal, and to truly thrive.

This is what I now call inner stress.

It’s the impact stressors have on our nervous system, body, brain emotions, and sense of self. And it often begins long before we realize it.

Inner Stress Can Begin Before We’re Even Born

Looking back, I see how the seeds of inner stress were planted early. My mother, who was deeply unhappy, had her own inner stress that resulted in a chronically dysregulated nervous system. Research now shows that the stress state of a mother can impact the nervous system of a developing baby.

I grew up feeling like I had to be busy all the time. I was productive, responsible, and successful—but I didn’t know how to be still. I didn’t know what it felt like to feel safe in my body. I had chronic migraines, emotional sensitivity, and a tendency to override what I needed in order to meet expectations.

But at the time, no one was talking about nervous system regulation. We weren’t taught that these patterns weren’t just personality quirks—they were signs of survival physiology at play.

When the System Breaks Down

Years later, as I was navigating the intense stress of caring for aging parents, the subtle imbalances in my system reached a tipping point. The symptoms that surfaced were terrifying—and they were signs that my nervous system was stuck in overdrive.

And yet, despite seeing countless professionals—from integrative doctors to neurologists to chiropractors—not one of them mentioned nervous system regulation.

Yes, they acknowledged stress. But no one explained that healing required me to work with my nervous system—not just my mind, not just my symptoms.

It wasn’t until I began exploring intentional nervous system regulation—through conscious breathing, meditation, mindfulness, vagal toning and HeartMath practices—that things began to shift.

That’s when I started to heal.

What Inner Stress Looks Like

Inner stress can take many forms. For some, it shows up as chronic health issues, anxiety or emotional reactivity. For others, it’s exhaustion, hormone imbalances, or a quiet but persistent sense of emptiness—even when life looks good on the outside.

It might look like:

• Saying “yes” when you want to say no.
• Feeling like you’ve lost touch with yourself.
• Being stuck in overthinking or perfectionism.
• Feeling flat, numb, or on edge for no reason you can explain.

And at the core of all of it is a dysregulated nervous system that can be healed. This means that when we regulate our nervous system we create an inner environment for healing from all sorts of chronic physical and mental health issues.

Why This Isn’t Just a Mental Health Issue

This isn’t just about psychology or mindset.

It’s not about trying harder or being more positive.

This is about how safe your body feels—moment to moment. It’s about how your nervous system is wired to protect you, and how old patterns, emotional wounds, and stress imprints can keep you stuck in survival mode.

And it’s also about what modern medicine too often misses: the intelligence of the body, the nervous system and the wisdom of the soul.

When Science Meets Soul

Researchers and thought leaders like Dr. Stephen Porges (Polyvagal Theory), Dr. Bessel van der Kolk (The Body Keeps the Score), and Dr. Gabor Maté (The Myth of Normal) have helped shift the conversation around stress and trauma to a more holistic view of healing and health. .

They’ve shown that healing begins when we feel safe—not just physically, but emotionally and relationally.

What they don’t always say (but I believe deeply) is that healing also begins when we start living in alignment with our soul—our true nature and who we were born to become.

Because just as trauma and chronic stress can dysregulate us, so can living out of sync with who we really are. Our soul withdraws energy when we’re off-path. That withdrawal might look like burnout or depression—but it’s also a summons to return to ourselves and live in alignment with our truths..

Inner Stress Isn’t a Flaw—It’s a Signal

If you’re feeling stressed, anxious, depleted, or just “off,” know this:

You’re not broken. You’re becoming.

Your nervous system is trying to protect you. Your soul is trying to guide you. And your symptoms aren’t a sign of weakness—they’re a sign that something inside you wants to change and emerge.

Self-Regulation for Healing, Health, and Happiness

In my work now, I help people recognize inner stress for what it is—and give them tools to work with it, not against it.

I guide them through a process I call the 4 Keys to Authentic Happiness, and the first key is Self-Regulation.

Because before we can change our thoughts, our patterns, or our lives, we need to create stability within. That begins with calming the nervous system, making the body and brain feel safe again, and creating the inner space for our body to heal, our soul to speak and for healing, health and authentic happiness to arise.

Your Next Step

If any of this resonates—if you’ve been carrying stress you can’t name, or feeling like something’s off but can’t explain why—I invite you to begin here.

You can download my free Meditation Essentials Guide to explore simple tools that support regulation, safety, and self-trust.

Or, if you’re ready to go deeper, I’d be honored to walk alongside you. Schedule a discovery session and we’ll explore what’s unfolding for you—and what wants to emerge.

Because healing, health and happiness don’t begin by fixing yourself.

They begin by coming home to yourself.